Pope Francis took to the Vatican website yesterday to declare that the only fish that should be consumed by Catholics during the observance of Lent is the Filet-O-Fish sandwich from McDonald’s.
“Topped with melted American cheese, creamy tarter sauce and served on a soft, steamed bun, McDonald’s lightly breaded, tender fish filet is one of the closes things to Heaven on Earth you will find,” Pope Francis posted on the front page of the website. “Pair that with an order of their world famous french fries and an ice cold Coca-Cola and it's like Jesus himself is sitting there with you singing, Ba da ba ba ba.”
Many in the Vatican are afraid that the leadership of Pope Francis has been compromised. Speculations have been made by several Cardinals that someone with the McDonald’s corporation has pressured the Pope, pushing him towards this decision by monetary gain or even physical harm. Some have spoken out saying they don’t believe the Pope when he says that any Catholics going to Burger King or Wendy’s for fish have “punched a one way ticket to Hell.” However, most believe it when he says anyone eating at Long John Silver’s will experience their own personal hell a couple hours later.
A considerable amount of Archdioceses around the country think that Pope Francis is just up to his crazy Pope tomfoolery once again. Like when he tried to replace the communion wafers with Funyuns. Francis being Francis is the best way to describe it. Not to mention, it's also a top selling t-shirt in Rome now. Whatever the reasoning for this new McDonald's brand loyalty, his robes have never looked better. Dare say, I'm lovin' it?
“Topped with melted American cheese, creamy tarter sauce and served on a soft, steamed bun, McDonald’s lightly breaded, tender fish filet is one of the closes things to Heaven on Earth you will find,” Pope Francis posted on the front page of the website. “Pair that with an order of their world famous french fries and an ice cold Coca-Cola and it's like Jesus himself is sitting there with you singing, Ba da ba ba ba.”
Many in the Vatican are afraid that the leadership of Pope Francis has been compromised. Speculations have been made by several Cardinals that someone with the McDonald’s corporation has pressured the Pope, pushing him towards this decision by monetary gain or even physical harm. Some have spoken out saying they don’t believe the Pope when he says that any Catholics going to Burger King or Wendy’s for fish have “punched a one way ticket to Hell.” However, most believe it when he says anyone eating at Long John Silver’s will experience their own personal hell a couple hours later.
A considerable amount of Archdioceses around the country think that Pope Francis is just up to his crazy Pope tomfoolery once again. Like when he tried to replace the communion wafers with Funyuns. Francis being Francis is the best way to describe it. Not to mention, it's also a top selling t-shirt in Rome now. Whatever the reasoning for this new McDonald's brand loyalty, his robes have never looked better. Dare say, I'm lovin' it?
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