"The guilt became so intense that it was turning my insides dry and stale," the cake continued. "Every time I got picked over a piece of regular chocolate cake, a small crumb inside me died. Deep down I knew I was no better than that vanilla cake or that black forest cake or even that carrot cake. But I fell in love with the popularity and fame that came with being a red velvet cake. The celebrity of it all went straight to my icing. I loved how it made me feel to be out there and hear the excitement in someone's voice. 'Oooo. Red velvet cake.' I would get such a high from it. I just had to keep chasing that dragon"
Although red velvet cake has been around since the early 1900's, it's popularity has had a resurgence over the last thirty years. It's traditionally a chocolate layer cake with cream cheese icing and beetroot or red food coloring to create the red shade. Many have caught on to this charade already and feel this is just another publicity stunt by red velvet cake to keep its name relevant.
"I would like to deeply apologize to the rest of my dessert brothers and sisters. I've lived a lie for a long time and I've hurt many of you throughout the years. I just hope some day you can forgive me and welcome me back to that cake table in your hearts. From this day forward I want to only be my true self. No more lies. No more hiding behind something I'm not. Grab a fork world. I am a chocolate cake."
Most cakes replied with no comment about the emotional reveal from red velvet. The only one that did answer was angel food cake and it was less than pleasant.