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Nirvana's "Nevermind" Turns 25 Today.

9/23/2016

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Dear Nirvana's "Nevermind", 
 
       You turn 25 years old today. Congratulations.  You can legally rent a car now.  I bought you from one of those  12 CDs for a penny ads and I couldn't have been more excited to rock with you.  You came in the mail with the likes of Smash Mouth's "Fush Yu Mang" , Sheryl Crow's "Tuesday Night Music Club", Boys II Men "Cooleyhighharmony" and the Above the Rim soundtrack.  But rest assured, it was you I really wanted.

​      Even though you're probably in a junkyard somewhere, still under the seat of my 1988 Buick Skyhawk, I still remember the good times we had and want to thank you for being such a bad ass album that I once owned.  Then later burned for free off Napster.  Then burned for free off Limewire. Then ripped  from a torrent site for free.  Now I just stream you from Spotify. Free.  Oddly enough I still own Smash Mouth no matter how hard I try to get rid of.  It's a demon I can't seem to exorcise.  It's like I might as well be walking on the sun. 

Sincerely,
Your smelly teen spirit.
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The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Announces Change in Format.

9/18/2016

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      Starting this week, The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon will change the guest segment of the show to only include the most evil, dangerous and racists guests. In a short press release sent out early this morning, The Tonight Show said the change came after Fallon had such a great time with Donald Trump on last week's show.

      "After I playfully tussled Trump's rad hair last Thursday, I realized I should have more rad people like him on,"  Fallon said in the press release.  "I'm tired of having great actors and musicians on that people actually enjoy.  I'd be way more stoked to talk to racist, misogynistic, serial liars.  The more despicable and vile you are as a human being, the radder.  Now you don't necessarily have to be a murderer or a rapist but it would be totally rad if you were.  I think doing the thank you notes segment with someone who took an innocent life would be so rad. Or a lip sync battle with someone who wants to eliminate an entire race of people.  So rad.  So, so rad."

​      The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon airs weeknights on NBC.  This weeks guest list includes:
Charles Manson
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Kim Jong Un
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Adolf Hitler
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Ramsay Bolton
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Cruella Deville
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